Tickler 2005
Let the word go henceforth out -- the Tickler is back.
If it has been a long cold winter for you, dear readers, (and only about to get colder and darker with the inauguration and the opening of Congress) for me it has been a hot muggy swelter of work, grad school apps, and lingering depression over Nov. 2.
But the apps are in, its a new year, and if all goes well Bush will burn the shit out of his hand on the old Social Security third rail (kind of like Frog grasping the medallion in Raiders of the Lost Ark, howling and wincing at the sickly sweet smell of his own charred flesh, to the mildly guilty satisfaction of millions of viewers), leading to a spectacular 4 years of lame-duck ineffectualness.
As for me, I'm feeling good about 2005. Hope to get this armed violence thing under control in Brazil, maybe legalize drugs, and get the whole income inequality problem wrapped up before starting school in August. Oh, and I want to learn how to surf.
And to you, the Tickler diehards who still check in every once and again, let me say that when you look back along the trail you have walked, and see the long lonely stretches where no Tickler comforted you, and feel kind of sad about that, and then all of a sudden you hear a deep, manly, semitic voice break through the sunlit clouds saying "My son (or daughter), I, the Freedom Tickler, didn't abandon you in your time of need. I carried you," yes dear reader, when you hear that voice, cast your eyes up to the heavens, look deep within your soul, and you will know: the Tickler is full of shit. It didn't carry you. It abandoned you.
The Tickler is nothing if not cunning.
If it has been a long cold winter for you, dear readers, (and only about to get colder and darker with the inauguration and the opening of Congress) for me it has been a hot muggy swelter of work, grad school apps, and lingering depression over Nov. 2.
But the apps are in, its a new year, and if all goes well Bush will burn the shit out of his hand on the old Social Security third rail (kind of like Frog grasping the medallion in Raiders of the Lost Ark, howling and wincing at the sickly sweet smell of his own charred flesh, to the mildly guilty satisfaction of millions of viewers), leading to a spectacular 4 years of lame-duck ineffectualness.
As for me, I'm feeling good about 2005. Hope to get this armed violence thing under control in Brazil, maybe legalize drugs, and get the whole income inequality problem wrapped up before starting school in August. Oh, and I want to learn how to surf.
And to you, the Tickler diehards who still check in every once and again, let me say that when you look back along the trail you have walked, and see the long lonely stretches where no Tickler comforted you, and feel kind of sad about that, and then all of a sudden you hear a deep, manly, semitic voice break through the sunlit clouds saying "My son (or daughter), I, the Freedom Tickler, didn't abandon you in your time of need. I carried you," yes dear reader, when you hear that voice, cast your eyes up to the heavens, look deep within your soul, and you will know: the Tickler is full of shit. It didn't carry you. It abandoned you.
The Tickler is nothing if not cunning.
posted by Benjamin Lessing at 10:22 PM
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