Should I Stay or Should I Go?
Yesterday I received at least 4 e-mails, depending on how you count, from friends or family wondering out loud if they should leave the U.S. ("Any room down there?" read one).
First off, yes, there is room down here, and the weather is lovely.
And I would be lying if I said that I have never thanked my stars for being light-years away from whatever shitstorm happened to be brewing on the home-front. I remember hearing about the whole Monica Levinsky thing from some Brits at a cafe in Prague, and then promptly and blissfully forgetting about it for the next several months.
But this only goes so far. With democracy on the march and all, it's hard to truly tune out. And you wouldn't really want to. Me and my gringo friends here all experienced a desire to be in the US yesterday, just because nobody here could relate to what we were feeling (the exact same thing happened on 9/11).
I've been an ex-pat for 8 out of the past 9 years. I've never felt more American than I do now. Since Iraq, there is sort of nowhere to hide from it all.
And yet, and yet... I had been planning for a year to begin a doctorate next year in the states. Now I am looking at European universities too. If I look at the States objectively, not as my home but as a country like any other I might choose to live in, to learn about, to be influenced by, I gotta say it doesn't look so good.
Then again, there is the horrible irony of it all: if all the good liberals and progressives leave, the right really will have won.
On a deeper level, there is a related question which all of us, ex-pats and pats alike, must ask ourselves: Will we stay engaged, keep fighting, take to the streets, the internet, whatever, or will we hole ourselves up and wait for the storm to pass?
There is the wonderful story of George Orwell, stopping in Paris on his way to fight the fascists in the Spanish Civil War, and looking up Henry Miller. Two of the most different writers imaginable, but Orwell quite respected Miller. Miller thought Orwell was crazy for going to Barcelona: "You're going to get yourself killed, man." Miller's idea of liberty was entirely personal, and he had a Buddha-like lack of desire to change the world around him. Orwell of course saw the fight against fascism as the fight of a lifetime. Miller gave Orwell a corduroy jacket to keep him warm on the front, and the two parted friends. In 1940, Orwell, already quite disillusioned with his efforts in Spain, wrote Inside the Whale, whose title refers to what he saw as Miller's strategy: ride out the tempests of human idiocy and hatred by insulating oneself, keeping your humanity alive, hoping that one day you will be able to emerge.
I don't think there is a right answer to this. I think each of us, over the next 4, 8, 24 years will have to do a little bit of Orwell and a little bit of Miller. I think even Orwell saw this.
To my friends on the front: I offer you a corduroy jacket of words to keep you warm. And when you've had enough of the trenches, come visit me in Vichy, or Big Sur, or wherever I am hiding out these days.
First off, yes, there is room down here, and the weather is lovely.
And I would be lying if I said that I have never thanked my stars for being light-years away from whatever shitstorm happened to be brewing on the home-front. I remember hearing about the whole Monica Levinsky thing from some Brits at a cafe in Prague, and then promptly and blissfully forgetting about it for the next several months.
But this only goes so far. With democracy on the march and all, it's hard to truly tune out. And you wouldn't really want to. Me and my gringo friends here all experienced a desire to be in the US yesterday, just because nobody here could relate to what we were feeling (the exact same thing happened on 9/11).
I've been an ex-pat for 8 out of the past 9 years. I've never felt more American than I do now. Since Iraq, there is sort of nowhere to hide from it all.
And yet, and yet... I had been planning for a year to begin a doctorate next year in the states. Now I am looking at European universities too. If I look at the States objectively, not as my home but as a country like any other I might choose to live in, to learn about, to be influenced by, I gotta say it doesn't look so good.
Then again, there is the horrible irony of it all: if all the good liberals and progressives leave, the right really will have won.
On a deeper level, there is a related question which all of us, ex-pats and pats alike, must ask ourselves: Will we stay engaged, keep fighting, take to the streets, the internet, whatever, or will we hole ourselves up and wait for the storm to pass?
There is the wonderful story of George Orwell, stopping in Paris on his way to fight the fascists in the Spanish Civil War, and looking up Henry Miller. Two of the most different writers imaginable, but Orwell quite respected Miller. Miller thought Orwell was crazy for going to Barcelona: "You're going to get yourself killed, man." Miller's idea of liberty was entirely personal, and he had a Buddha-like lack of desire to change the world around him. Orwell of course saw the fight against fascism as the fight of a lifetime. Miller gave Orwell a corduroy jacket to keep him warm on the front, and the two parted friends. In 1940, Orwell, already quite disillusioned with his efforts in Spain, wrote Inside the Whale, whose title refers to what he saw as Miller's strategy: ride out the tempests of human idiocy and hatred by insulating oneself, keeping your humanity alive, hoping that one day you will be able to emerge.
I don't think there is a right answer to this. I think each of us, over the next 4, 8, 24 years will have to do a little bit of Orwell and a little bit of Miller. I think even Orwell saw this.
To my friends on the front: I offer you a corduroy jacket of words to keep you warm. And when you've had enough of the trenches, come visit me in Vichy, or Big Sur, or wherever I am hiding out these days.
posted by Benjamin Lessing at 11:25 AM
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